From someone who experienced it first hand not too long ago — me.
I just started my new job a few days ago. Before that, I took a break for 3 months to get some rest and kickstart my personal projects.
Even though I worked hard, I kinda forgot how it’s like — working . Most of the time, I was doing my thing, taking it slow, enjoying my own company.
And there I was — in a new office with barely anyone I knew from before. It was the first time I got to interact with that many people. For 3 months.
It was rough, mentally. It was like fighting a battle against my own mind — which was telling me I was f*cking up in multiple ways.
I know I wasn’t, but at one point, I forgot that was the truth.
Here are a couple of things I found to escalate my anxiety to the next level. So if you’re in a dire situation like I was, maybe try refraining from them.
1. Making ad-hoc changes to existing plan
If you are a spontaneous person like me, chances are you might want to switch up plans here and there, work or personal life.
When we are anxious, it’s worse. My brain keeps jumping from one flow of thought to another. The impulse to switch things around feel even stronger.
Thing is, if the plan was set the way it is, it was probably for the best. The amount of time dedicated to work, rest, or socialize.
If you set out a goal for yourself to be in the office for 3 days to get to know more people, stick with it. Changing it out of fear means two things:
- First, you end up questioning whether things could have been different if you had stuck with your plan.
We planned things when we think the most rationally, meaning in our best interest. Fear doesn’t think in our interest. Fear is fear. It makes us feel less of who we really are.
- Second, by changing plans out of fear, we start questioning our own credibility. “Was I too stupid to assume I could do it?”
We all know we are not stupid, and that we could do anything we put our mind to, so let’s not fall into that trap.
2. Procrastinating the follow-ups to key action items
Usually, we get anxiety when we step into the unknown: whether it’s starting a new job, pitching a business plan, relocating overseas.
Whatever it is, it’s probably not the usual day-to-day tasks we are used to. The stakes are probably much higher.
Thing is, important decisions usually feel like a major burden when we are anxious — especially when involving other people.
We don’t want to take actions. No action means no mistake. No mistake mean no more anxiety.
Well, that’s true when the things we are supposed to follow up on are neither time-sensitive nor dependency items.
When it is, trust me, consequences will bite back at ya in no time. People will chase. You will be questioned by others and yourself.
Just list all the things you NEED to do. Do them and get them out of the way ASAP. That will save you some much-needed headspace.
3. Following up on unnecessary stuffs
It sounds contradicting to point #2. I know.
Thing is, there are three types of actions one could do:
- Actions that are part of the plan and is rationally thought-through, therefore value-adding.
- Actions that are not part of the plan, but is key to trouble-shoot an emerging situations.
- Actions that are not of the plan, whose benefits are not yet determined.
The first two are quite obviously the things we need to deal with immediately. You will be worse off doing nothing.
However, the last type of action probably require more time for you to calm down, and make the decision with a clearer mind.
If you are not sure whether you should add new things to your plan, don’t do it yet. You might end up having a semi-burnout your first week at work.
If you are debating whether to step up and network intensively, don’t it yet. You might spend the next week worrying how you might be perceived by others.
There’s no right or wrong. With time, we have a better grasp of the people and the culture wherever we are. The answer will give itself away.
4. Being on the receiving end of people’s negativity
I am a really good listener. I enjoy listening and helping people with their problems. But it doesn’t help when I’m the anxious person myself.
If you could, make it known to your friends and family that your capacity is limited in the time being. It could feel difficult saying NO to people in need.
But you are also a person in need. Taking in their burden while ignoring yours is only going to produce resentment.
So, be aware of your own little energy tank, and flags it out when it’s running empty. That’s only understandable.
5. Some last practical tips for y’all
I’m grouping my two last random yet helpful tips into one: First, don’t try new food when you are anxious — nausea doesn’t go well with anxiety.
Second, avoid rush hours at all costs. When anxiety meets rush hours, I become this monster who is high on adrenaline, anxiety, and extremely irritable.
Well, that has been quite a good ride getting through last week. It ended well and I felt rather satisfied despite all the anxiety. I guess, that’s a win.
One little final reminder before we part way again: one thing that made my anxiety worse was that when deep in it, I forgot it will, at one point, pass.
Whatever I was feeling was not going to be there forever. As soon as I remembered that, my heart felt more relieved than ever.
I hope this helps, and see you again, friends :)
Instagram: @lifewithmido | Medium: Mido
You can directly subscribe to my Medium here
In case you have any questions or suggestions, let me know here.
